But deep inside my heart there’s someone in me that crave for attention, loving every minute being in the limelight though I wouldn’t admit it out loud. I wanna people recognize me not just as some girl next door or some quiet girl that will only speak up whenever she’s in her comfort zone. I envied every human being that have the courage to speak out loud what their opinion (no matter how stupid it sound), I envied those attention seeker people because I would never be as daring as that.
Whenever I watched a movie with a daring character, I keep on wishing I could be just like that. I did try to channel some character as my own, I will admit now that I used to imitate Daria a cartoon character at MTV. The reason I imitate this character because she is bold, she’s not the type to pleased people or give a crap about what they think about her, I like the fact that she seldom smiled. I like bitchy character more than the nice one. I prefer Lindsay Lohan as a Mean Girl in ‘Mean Girls’, I like those bitchy types that will do anything to get what she want no matter what. It makes me wonder why can’t I be like that.
Why can’t I just treat people like trash I don’t give a fuck with whether they like it or not. I want to be brave, I want to be courageous, I want to be bold… and yet I am anything but that…
I am just a plain and ordinary girl, trying to strive, trying to keep up, struggling to be a part of this world, hoping that one day this plain girl voice would be heard by somebody.
This entry will be ended by pictures of our family little outings.