The first post of April

Wow... I promised myself to blog at least once a week but then I am too preoccupied with... hell I don't even know what makes me busy. What I've been doing mostly is going to classes, jogging, finishing last minute assignments, being annoyed at someone and ermm... enjoying life?

The truth is I don't know what makes me super busy is not that I'm doing my FYP (there's no actual progress there), I'm not doing any studying (finishing last minute assignments is not studying) and that's the 2 most important thing I should be doing right now. The only real work I did is jogging which I loooove! because it takes my mind off any stress.

What I've been doing was catching up all the "rest" I needed, spending time with families and day dreaming. ARGHHH!!! I should be panicking because it is the middle of the semester and I haven't even do any real work on my FYP also nil studying.

I don't want to get any panic attack because that would do me no good at all since I am a very panicky person. It annoys me when my friends teased me of being panic like they never panic before. I hate it when they teased me that because it only worsen my panic attack. What I need when I'm panicking is silent and away from people that causing the panic.

Well, complaining won't do any good, action is more important. Since I am easily panic, I guess I work better alone. I don't want to listen noisy voices being with people that make me feel stupid. I don't want to bother with other people's problem. I don't need to be to reliable one or to be the saviour in every single problem that is not mine. It sound selfish but I need my own time to solve my own work. I have to set my priorities correctly.

My "correct" priorities is :

1. FYP
2. STUDY
3. Exercise

Enough of this self pity post... Lemme update the happier side of my life. Roomie/Boyfriend/ArchEnemy got a new job! YAY!!! I can't really announce it yet but I'm so excited for him and last night I saw him doing some research made me feel so proud and loved that my baby is brave enough to take the risk for us (I love you so much!). Our life will be getting much better, thank you god! That's why I need to stop fooling around and finish my studies so we can a better life than now. I don't want to live in this matchbox room any more.

I want to live in this apartment!

  

Imagine dining with a beautiful view of the sea/city... Well, my dream apartment condo would be at The Peak. I really like it there, I like that kind of lifestyle. Although probably I couldn't own a dog there since a dog need a space where it can run around especially a Labrador. But I saw one of the owner (or maybe that's the maid... not sure) walk her lab along the coastline. Well I assumed they came from The Peak that means even though I live at The Peak I can own a lab. YAY! <--- again.="" daydreaming="" nah="" nbsp="" p="">

Ok la... I have to go back to work. I need to finish it up so I can focus on my school work. :) Wish me luck and hopefully my attention span will last longer than a lab. lololololol... 

Sincerely 

CyntaCinta

Better than before

I was going through my external hard disk looking for old school notes and of course typical me always get distracted over silly things. Since I am literally a picture hoarder (my phone now has over 1000 pictures in it (-_-)).... So I look into the pictures and was shock, horrified and disgusted. I look so horrible before I didn't even realize it.  

 Zero photoshop. Look at my skin! Look how horrible my skin was. My face look so fat. This picture was back in 2008 before my trip to Jakarta at my old room (had to blur out the ugly bits) using my olympus digicam. I look older in 2008 compare to now IMHO.  

Here's a recent picture using my sony SLR camera with light makeup (bb cream + eyeliner). My cheek is less chubby than before and of course much better skin condition. Also without photoshop. 

Here's without any makeup using my old sony xperia phone. I think the lines underneath my eyes getting worse and dark circle even when I slept for 8 hours. That's my goal this year for skin condition less oily face and goodbye dark circle. 

I weight about 53kg in 2008 and now I weight around 46kg. I am happy with the difference although I do want to lose more weight and am working towards it. I want to be lean, I'm getting a bit bored with my family always referring me as the fat one. It's a struggle to control my food intake around them when they always expected I ate food for 2 people. I am a bit ashamed if I cannot finish my food or have to say no whenever my parents urge me to eat more. 

I hope I will able to achieve my weight goal this year since last year I failed although losing 7kg is a wonderful accomplishment. :) All that was using ginger pills for constipation problem and lessen my carbs intake also food intake. It was not healthy but hey, 7kg gone. So this year rather than doing that I am exercising more to lose weight and gain muscle.   

Maybe I can look like @mankofit one day. She's been my inspiration.    

As for my skin condition I guess since I now take much better care of my skin. I want to try the collagen pills and see yet another skin transformation. Maybe I can get skin like Adira's. But all that cost money, if anyone can sponsor me, I would be really happy and will blog for the free stuff, hahaha.

Maybe when I am confident enough I will show my body progress. Now, just wish me luck and I hope that anyone out there who is striving will achieve their own goals as well. 

Till then...

CyntaCinta

    

I Mishu Blog

Hey you...

I mishu so much. I've been so busy with real life that I had to neglect you. But I am back for good and I promise to see you at least once a week. I can't afford a shrink and maybe a little writing will help me to keep my sanity.

Anyway... what have to be done is done. All I need to do now is to keep on fighting till the end. I am excited though I am still my oldself the procrastinator and that is what holding me from fighting. Damnit I am too old to be ADD and I need this to work. Dear lord help me...

On another note... one of my dog died. The sweet purak... killed so that she'll be out of her misery. Her life was so short and sad. She had a severe infection on her head and won't let anyone near her. She refuse to eat, her baby died inside her and she went blind. She was a living corpse. I wish I getbto know her but after piso died I never really love another dog.

What's the matter with me... updating you with sad news. I'm being overly melodramatic here. Lemme update with some mre cheerful news. I adopted a cyber pet.

It's Pou the alien! I saw it from my junior's instagram and because the maternal side of me is finally kicking in. I thought to myself lets get a baby alien. Lolololol...

I am also into this game, pet salon.

Been playing lots of phone game to keep my mind preoccupied since I was so stress last week. Haven't really got on track yet. But tomorrow will be a different day.

Anyway... wish me luck. According to my instagram I am "vain and proud", I end this post with a selca. Lolololol.

Roomie and I!

Xoxo - suicidecandy

Long time no see.

Well, hello dear blog. How are you since the last time I left you? Me... Fine, except that class finally started and 

THIS IS MY FUCKING LAST SEMESTER! WOOHOO!!!!

I spend most of my youth doing tutorial, assignment and final exam. Damn you engineering degree! Damn you.... It's been a long time since I travel outside Sabah eh... No, I did actually travel outside Sabah last year. I finally went shopping in KL! My sister and I spend most of our time there at Sungei Wang, we can already memorize the building plan. LOL Oyeah... Also budget travel to Labuan recently. But still there's a lot of places I want to visit and I admit that I am damn jealous with people who travel and able to travel outside the country. Damn PTPTN blacklist. 

So the last time I left you, I was in Valentine blues mode... Life partner and I were apart from each other. He was busy with work and I was busy pretending to be sick so I don't have to feed the dogs that I have to babysit. I stay at my parents home and celebrated Valentine alone with =

Ate this Chocolate liquor alone. 

Anyway... To make it up. Life partner did bought me an early Valentine / belated (very belated indeed) birthday present. 

Yay! I finally have a brand new phone. It's only S3 mini  but I still love it and it have a front face camera so I can camwhore shamelessly everyday. Which you can view in my instagram profile. Do follow me because I mostly follow back if you're not some fake account. 

That's all for now I will be updating again soon. :)

xoxo

CyntaCinta